by David N Johnson

June 15, 2022

Do you feel it? Or, rather, do you feel the emptiness that it leaves behind? Without purpose, you’re left with a huge purpose-shaped hole deep inside you.

You can try to fill it with whatever you have but nothing besides purpose can ever truly fill it. Not completely.

Many people try to fill it with money, people, and things but quickly learn that there’s no substitute for purpose. It’s like trying to put the wrong puzzle pieces together. You may be able to force two of them to fit but it will never look quite right.

You may look at your life and think that it’s pretty good, and it may be, but unless you find your purpose you’ll never truly be at peace.

Without purpose, you’re destined to live a weakened existence as that hole inside you calls out to be filled.

Finding Your Purpose is an Inside Job

Purpose isn’t something that you find. It’s something that you discover. It’s easy to confuse purpose with some sort of outward action, dont. Purpose is a feeling.

Finding your purpose starts with understanding how you WANT to feel. So, start there.

What does it look like to be your idealized self?

  • What do you value?
  • What are you doing with your life?
  • What beliefs guide you?
  • How do you spend your days?
  • How do you feel about yourself?
  • What’s important to you?
  • Who are you morally?

Understanding who you want to be and how you want to feel will allow you to discover your purpose. It all starts with being clear with yourself about what you want and need.

Use the answers to these questions as a guide post now so that you can work towards becoming the idealized version of yourself later.

Your Purpose isn’t a Destination

Finding your purpose isn’t a place that you arrive at. It’s not some sort of destination that you can travel to.

It’s in the journey that a true life’s purpose is discovered.

The journey is what prepares you for the destination. It ensures that you are capable of receiving the gifts that come with it. This is a very important concept to understand because once you get rid of the idea that purpose is only achieved once you get somewhere or accomplish something then you can focus on what really matters, the journey.

Finding Your Purpose Takes Courage

Living a life of purpose and meaning takes the courage to try. It’s easier to stay stuck and not even try because at least you know where you are. The unknown can be scary. The risks can seem too much. Why risk what you have for something you may not even be able to achieve?

That’s what your inner bully keeps telling you anyway. It keeps you stuck. It prevents you from pushing forward. It’s time that you put your fear behind you and gain the courage to push forward.

Stop allowing yourself to be held back by the fear of even trying. It’s time that you take some responsibility for your actions or the lack thereof. It takes courage to make that first step but once you do… watch out!

How to be More Courageous

Being courageous is NOT the same as being fearless. Courage is about taking action while being afraid. It’s about being willing to ACT fearless despite the anxiety and fear that you may be feeling. It’s about staring fear in the face and refusing to allow it to paralyze your forward momentum.

Change Your Perspective

Being fearful isn’t a bad thing. We all feel it. Fear lets us know when we need to pay extra attention. When you begin to feel a paralyzing fear begin to well up inside you, don’t sweep it under the rug. Instead, name it.

Give your fears a voice and say it out loud.

I am afraid that _____________.

Fear is your mind’s reaction to the unknown. Get to know your fear and where it came. Write it down or share it with a supporting person. Stop denying that it doesn’t exist. By acknowledging your fear and talking about it you’re being courageous in the face of fear.

Identify Your Strengths

Now that you’ve acknowledged your fears, identify the strengths that you currently pose that can be used to overcome them. If it’s a weakness that’s holding you back, get to work at overcoming those weaknesses.

It takes courage to turn a weakness into a strength. It helps you to gain momentum.

Leave Your Comfort Zone Often

Being courageous isn’t always about making large leaps. Every day, do something that makes you uncomfortable. Push outside of your comfort zone.

  • Speak up at work
  • Raise your hand in class
  • Talk in front of a small crowd
  • Ask for directions
  • Talk to a stranger

Celebrate Your Courageous Moments

Being more courageous is all about changing your perception of fear. Whenever you do something courageous reward yourself. Get exciting about it. It’s all about rewiring your brain to see fear as an indicator of which direction you need to lean into.

Finding Your Purpose Doesn’t Have to be Hard

Your purpose doesn’t have to be hard to find. You just have to learn to listen and focus inward.

Once you discover your purpose it will give your life a new meaning. It will give you direction and will always point the direction you should go.

Ikigai is a Japanese word that means a reason for being. It’s the intersection between what you love, what the world needs, what you can be paid for, and what you’re good at. It encompasses passion, vocation, mission, and profession. It’s a beautiful concept that gives you direction on how to find meaning.

I encourage you to do a little self-discovery. Search the word Ikigai and see what you can find.

Three grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.

Joseph Addison

About the author 

David N Johnson

  • T Lavon Lawrence says:

    What a wonderful instruction on how to find the strength to discover – to uncover – our unique Purpose so that it fuels, sustains, and nourishes our daily work at sculpting our best self, this to live our best life.

    • David N Johnson says:

      Thank you for commenting! To create your best self you must discover your purpose so that you can live that best life. What’s your purpose?

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