Things happen. Life won’t always be butterflies and rainbows. Adversity will strike, things will get tough, and you’ll start to question everything. Don’t. Easier said than done? Yes. Absolutely. But, you’re resilient. You can bounce back. You have to get your mind right.
To cultivate resiliency, you must focus on these three distinct characteristics:
Accept The Harshness of Reality
Don’t slip into the lie that is denial. Stay away from its warming embrace. It’s a trickster. Instead, accept the cold hard truth for what it is. No, it’s not as sexy as denial. Acceptance forces you to take responsibility. No, I didn’t say blame. Blame and taking responsibility are two different things. Knowing the difference between the two is essential. Blame leads to nothing but more blame; taking responsibility leads to growth.
By accepting the reality of the situation, you’re preparing yourself to survive adversity. You’re building up the endurance you need not only to overcome seasons of pain but to endure everything that comes along with them.
Search For Meaning
You’re not a victim. You’re a warrior. Search for order in the chaos and find meaning in adversity. Don’t allow the tough moments in life to define you. Rise above them and define your life despite them. Instead of asking “why me,” ask yourself, “what can this teach me?”
“Why me, ” leads to overwhelm. “What can this teach me, ” leads to insight. Reframe the questions you ask yourself and overcome!
Improvise
When adversity strikes, it’s easy to feel hopeless and alone, but the fact of that matter is that that couldn’t be further from the truth. You may think, at first, that you don’t have the resources to get out of the rut you’re in but if you take a look around you and start thinking of what you do have and how they can be used in unfamiliar ways, you begin to see how you CAN help yourself.
This was years ago, and I’m no mechanic, but I worked for a linen company at the time, and while making a delivery, the truck I was driving had a mechanical issue. I was a couple of hours drive from the plant when I called the mechanic and told him what happened. I was driving on the interstate when the gas pedal all of a sudden dropped to the floor, and I started losing speed until I came to a stop on the shoulder. I was told to hang tight for a few hours and that he would come and get me and exchange trucks so that I could finish my route.
I’m not sure why I did it, but I opened the hood (my wife will tell you that I’m no mechanic) and noticed right away that a cable had broken. When I pulled on it, the gas pedal would lift back up off the floor. I remembered that there was a paper clip (one of the big ones) in the cup holder and used it to fix the cable. I was able to finish my route and get back to the plant.
If you train yourself to improvise you start to see things that others don’t. You’ll begin to see other uses for the resources at hand. Learn to improvise, and you’ll be able to overcome anything. Remember, you’re a warrior!