Are you ready to quit because the alternative looks too hard? Are you done writing your story because the last few chapters didn’t go as planned? That’s life. You can’t always win. I know that when in the midst of failure the pain of it is so blinding that you can’t see past it. At that moment it is life.
The desire to quit, to hide under a rock, or even the desire to end your own life are all things that look like the easy way out. They are not. Quitting leads to self-doubt, what-ifs, and ongoing depression. Giving up on a dream when you know that you could have done a little more to reach it is a pain that doesn’t go away.
Einstein once said that you couldn’t solve a problem with the same level of thinking that created them. I’ll add to that by saying any great breakthrough is immediately preceded by a change in perspective.
We can see failure as an end, or we can see it as one more way not to win. By changing your preserve of the failure from a dead-end to a stepping stone, you condition your mind to learn from the mistakes made. Is the way forward (after failing) hard? Yes. But stagnation is harder still. Not at first, of course, but in the long run quitting is infinitely harder than changing your perspective.
Accepting defeat when you know you can win is a difficult road but if you set your chin, learn from your mistakes, and forge ahead you may be closer to that breakthrough that you imagine.
To overcome failure, you must first accept it and your feelings towards it. You have the right to feel the way that you feel. Don’t push those feelings away, own them. By working to understand your feelings and how they affect you, you put yourself in a position to heal and gain perspective. Remember, there is a HUGE difference between a failure and being a failure. Failing is a part of life; being a failure is a state of mind.
Now that you understand better how you feel and why to ask yourself what went wrong. The best answers always come from the best questions, so ask yourself “what can I learn from this?” Or, “how can I adjust the way forward to prevent this from happening again?” Then, “what needs to be done differently?”
Above all, stay positive. Talk to positive people, read positive books, make positivity your center. Find inspiration. Allow yourself to be motivated.
Then, make a plan. Write down what you’ll do differently and stick to it. Don’t delay, start right away. There is nothing like overcoming failure and getting that first win. It’s a huge self-esteem boost, and after a failure, nothing feels better.
How will you change your perspective?
